A Different Kind of Gratitude

days like today make me:

                                  grateful for the fact

that not all days

 are like today.      

Not that it was super-awful--it could have been a lot worse, someone could have died, or Hostess could have gone out of business, or something equally terrible--but still,. it was not my favorite day of my recent existence.  

I feel physically miserable. 

So does my bank account. 

My apartment is falling apart, and the landlords are being difficult about it.

Tons of red tape for school.

Stupid dating.

Stupid Walmart. 

I am SO COLD.

...and Tired. 

Okay, with that pity-party set out, and to appease my well-intention-ed friends who combat my bad attitude with gratitude-fishing, here's the silver lining: 

I am grateful for modern medicine and for doctors who are trying to help me.

I am grateful for the opportunity to pay tithing and for the fact I have a full-time job. And, I'm grateful for (most of) the things, experiences, conveniences that that money is being used for. ..Most of them.

I have the opportunity to go back part-time to school and  continue pursuing my education.

Dating is still stupid, but it won't last forever. And Coolest Guy Ever is back to help talk me through it.

I managed, after an hour, to secure the last (of the correct model) space-heater at Stupid Walmart.

Thanks to space heater, my roommate is less cold. And I have a sweatshirt and blankets. Lots of blankets. 

and eventually the Tired will go away. 

And even with those silver linings, It's still okay for me to not be such a fan of the day. In fact, maybe I'm just justifying my bad attitude, but I think it's good sometimes to just be able to say 

"Wow. Today sucked. I hate to see what it would have been like if the Lord HADN'T been watching out for me.  But just because it could have been worse than it was...doesn't mean it didn't suck. 

Goodnight, world. 

Sleep well. 

I'll most likely kill you in the morning."

*~*~*~*

"The longer I live, the more I wonder--is this really PMS...or is this just my normal personality?"